Last week I lost a shit load of weight.
I drank wine every night, I ate whatever I wanted, and I barely exercised. It was fan-fucking-tastic!
Before you get too excited and start dialling for a pizza, this miracle weight loss did not melt one single cm off my bum or thighs, I do not have abs of steel and my bat wings have still have got a bit of jiggle when I wave.
It all came off my shoulders baby!
Yep this week I did a bit of a drama audit in my life, and shock horror, I discovered I was carrying some unnecessary baggage around!
Have you ever noticed that when you’ve got heaps on, when you’ve been busy balancing everything, juggling so many balls that you should technically have your own circus, that you don’t necessarily notice yourself getting caught up in extra stuff that isn’t even yours to carry?
It reminds me of my many adventures involving kids at the supermarket. Those trips where you are time poor and distracted, trying to break up their arguments and your phone is ringing, you’re trying to avoid them walking into those strategically placed towers of frigging toilet paper rolls or precariously arranged oranges… it’s like an obstacle course in there… anyway, the whole while, those cunning little small people are smiling sweetly and subtly sneaking stuff into your shopping trolley. It’s not until you get to the check out that you realise how much extra stuff you’ve got in your basket, and how much it is costing you.
WHOA FREDDY!!! I don’t think so!
Now Carlos (my laptop) and I have had a big month or so, doing some behind the scenes chickie work that will (hopefully) roll out next month. Which has left me a bit distracted, and standing at the proverbial check out of life, saying hang on…. What’s all of this other stuff that has snuck into my trolley eh?
Luckily, years of chickie stuff ups and bounce backs have taught me a thing or 2 about shopping trolleys.
I knew that it was time to
Stop! (Hammer time! Sorry I couldn’t resist)
Pull out my magical:
Lose Weight of the World Off My Shoulders diet plan!
Identify the dramas (that would be the extra crap that somehow managed to wangle itself into my shopping trolley).
They are pretty easy to spot. I generally know them by the feeling that they give me… generally anxious, uptight, wound up, like a knot in my stomach, dread, frustrated, overwhelmed, resentful, angsty, time poor, depleted… pick your poison.
Notice. How very fucking interesting… they usually fall into 2 categories… which is good because these 2 categories of drama are the easiest 2 to clean out.
Not mine (someone else’s problem or responsibility)
Aka The stuff I let bother me that is none of my business.
Not worth my time – I am investing a lot of time and energy for no benefit (to anyone really).
Get real. Really real.
Because there is always room to learn something.
I ask myself some honest, non-judgmental questions like,
- Is this my shit to carry, my drama to own?
- What am I gaining, what is anyone gaining by me carrying it?
- What am I NOT getting done while I am busy participating in this shit?
- Is this the best use of my time?
- And I love this one that a wise friend often says to me in her very best Marianne Williamson voice (I’m looking at you Dani)… What good can come from this?
I practice making some different choices.
When drama comes to town, I notice and then I ask:
- Is this necessary?
- How could I handle this differently?
- How can I kindly do what’s right for me?
It doesn’t necessarily mean that you have to walk away from people or situations.
Doesn’t mean you don’t care… it means you don’t have to carry it.
And no bloody way should you feel, or let anyone else try to make you feel bad for having boundaries around what drama you invite into your world.
In fact, when you aren’t carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders, when you take the time to invest in your own well being too, then you have more to give the people that you love.
And hey kids, this also means that Mum actually might have money left over at the check out to get you that freddo frog.
Everyone’s a winner!!!
So now with my free and easy shoulders, and my new mantra
I choose not to engage in unnecessary drama
Carlos and I will now get back to our usual routine of
Making small daily choices… to get us closer to where we want to be.
We will spend the extra time and energy that we have saved by ditching the drama on
Hanging with the people we love. Or loving the bejesus out of them from a distance.
Getting shit done.
Fucking ingenious I know!
Oh plus, I’m going to re read
The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck, Mark Manson
The Four Agreements, Don Miguel Ruiz
The Life Changing Magic of Not Giving a Fuck, Sarah Knight
Just to remind myself that I’m on the right track!
So what about you Magoo? (I’m really on a roll with the Dad jokes today aren’t I…)
Are you reading this little story and looking into your own shopping trolley thinking jeez Louise who snuck those Timtams in there?
What mountains are you carrying that you were only supposed to climb?
Couldn’t you do with a whole less weight on your lovely shoulders too?